Under Construction

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.  For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. " 

-2 Corinthians 4:16-18

When I look back at the past few years of my life, I notice that my life has been under construction and still is a work in progress. Ever since I said YES to the Lord and have surrendered my life to Him, the Lord has been shaping me to resemble Him more and more. 

To tell you the truth, I was a bit worried at first. How will God know how I want my life to look like? How will He know what I love the most? How can I give Him complete trust over  my most valuable asset, my life, the life I can live only once?

It hurt. Change is not easy. At many times I cried out to Him to go easy on me or even to stop. I felt confused and couldn't see a glimpse of what is ahead. I surrendered and tried to remain joyful all through-  holding on to His promises. I was confident and still am, that He who began a good work in me, will carry it on to completion (Philipians 1:6). I am not alone (Deuteronomy 31:6). I am in the hands of the Almighty who created my inmost being, who knit me in my mother's womb (Psalm 139:13), who has engraved my name on the palm of His hands (Isaiah 49:16). 

And to my surprise, when His work in my life started to blossom, I was overjoyed!!

And boy was I surprised. A feeling of belittlement swept me off my feet. How did I allow myself to doubt God's work, to doubt His purpose and worry. I was nagging and giving Him advice on how I would like my life to be, drawing Him maps and writing Him lists to help Him give me my way. 

Little did I know to what extent God is alive and at work. What I thought was best for me, what I thought would bring me pleasure, could not compare to what He gave me and is still giving me! I was like a child nagging for a cottage and feeling impatient to have it, and little did I know that He was taking His time in building me a mansion.  

God is building my house, my life, in the most delicate, detailed and perfect way I could ever imagine. His work is still in progress, and I don't expect the construction to be done anytime soon. I don't mind that as long as that I know that my life is in the hands of the perfect designer who loves me more than I love myself and who knows me more than I know myself and who wants what's best for me on the long run.  

I trust you Jesus, I am Yours, let Your will be done!